Sometimes I feel like a little three-year-old girl, desperate to stomp my feet so hard that the entire house would rumble and anyone in its quake would come running to me to find out what caused such a stir. I want to scream, “It’s not fair!” and have one person listen to what is not fair but also remedy the unfairness. The reality is, I am three plus a good forty-seven years seasoned and I just had back surgery so I am not able to stomp my feet with such aggravation, or I will hinder the work done to allow me to continue for the next fifty years without pain.
Life has been crazy lately, dishing out a massive amount of growth experiences that the Lord has been all too happy to use to test my patience. In January, we had an unfortunate incident caused by a utility company that led our home to be flooded with sewage. Yes, sewage. The upside is I work with many local businesses, so I had the remediation company on hand. We have been living in a stripped out, flooded home for the past seven months. It is getting fixed now, but the reason for the delay was out of my control but unjust and simply – unfair.
The back pain has been constant for the most part of an entire year until about the same time as the sewage sabotage on our home when it got worse. I did all the proper tests and appointments, and after some unfair and unjust dealings with insurance it was settled, and I would receive the surgery. Not only was I excited about remedying the pain, but I had two weeks of ‘rest and healing’ before I could go back to work; a much-needed break even if I was not able to drive, bend, twist, or lift. My husband was to work at home and take care of me. Little did he know work would demand more of him. It was unfair, but I understood. And as the second week came to be, I was antsy, needing to do something. So I dipped my toe back into the work waters to see if it was at the right temp to take a quick dip and hop back out. Much to my disbelief I had mistaken quicksand for water and found myself stuck the entire last week of the doctor prescribed ‘rest and healing’. There was so much needed to be done and I was soon up to my eyebrows in the necessities of work. I could claim unfair but then I’d be avoiding the fact that I chose to step my foot into that ‘water’.
I could go on about a multiple of other little things that salt and peppered these last few months leading me to my moment this afternoon, with the great desire to be that young Shannon, the one that used to stomp her feet, bend over, and stick her butt up in the air until someone paid attention and made it right! Yet, as I meditated on this, the truth was clear, and it was one I’ve known. No, they didn’t always make it right because what I wanted was not what was best for me, nor was what I felt unfair the entire story. Granted, yes, I do have a right to state some obvious unfairness to the diatribe I’ve ranted. But because I am half a century in the lessons God has led me through, I realize there will always be moments in life that are unfair but it is how we choose to handle those moments and what we choose to do with them that make an everlasting impression on ourselves and those around us.
Cry into your cheerios. It is okay. I give full permission to do so. But when you are done, wipe the tears and milk off your face and get on with the next best thing God has in store for you. He can’t do much for you when you’re blowing nose bubbles into your milk.
