I do not watch much TV anymore. I used to watch TV all the time. Actually, I used to watch sports and sports related news all the time. When our now almost eight year old was born, it was right at the beginning of football season. Since there is a limitation on what recreation you can do with a newborn, especially during flu season, I found that I had a lot of free time in the house. So when it was my turn to have my son nap on my chest or the couch for hours a day, I increased my already robust consumption of sports.
Like a kid with an unlimited shopping spree in a candy store, I used all of the screens available to me to follow as many sports as I could. Notifications on my phone, live sports on the TV when I could, and following my fantasy teams during games on the iPad while the live sports were on the TV. Every free second I could, I strove to fill it with the little dopamine hit I got from figuring out the latest news from around the sporting world. And it was fun.
To be clear: I did this in all of my free time. My work life and family responsibilities did not suffer, and I even prayed regularly, but I would squeeze as much sports as I could into the free time that I had. I was obsessed with my ‘hobby’.
One thing that I did not realize was happening as I followed sports was the effect it had on my interior life. Live sports are great entertainment for those who like the bodily urges of risk and reward, highs and lows, and overcoming loss for the sake of triumph. And as such, marketers use the loud, exciting, and suggestive commercials to appeal to the already stimulated senses. Additionally, the movies that are marketed to a sporting audience are ones that appeal to the masculine pitfalls of domination of others and sexual use of women. While an average Catholic can usually work through these temptations on a case by case basis to be able to watch the sporting event they are interested in without much harm, there can be a subtle shift that occurs in the interior life if we continually expose ourselves to constant noise and temptation.
We naturally take on some of the properties of what we consume. This is basic psychology and biology. If we consistently eat unhealthily, we get fat or sick. If we consistently consume media that preys on our carnal desires, then it will affect the disposition of our soul for the negative. For me, whenever I consumed more sporting media and its surrounding marketing during my son’s infancy, this took the form of heightened impatience, an increase in moodiness, and an interior aversion to sacrifice (lack of sleep did not help). Even though I strove to live the gospel exteriorly, it was a constant battle to not let my sometimes ugly interior expose itself to my family or the public.
This interior struggle is one that is the difference between a mediocre or lukewarm Christian life and the path to sainthood. For the person who desires sainthood, there will be exterior sacrifices that need to be made if the interior is going to emulate the disposition of Jesus. This is what it means to take up our cross and follow Him to be His disciple. Because when we finally let go of our worldly ‘candy,’ we are able to find rest in Him.
This process is not an easy one, just like it is not easy for a fat man to get off the couch and get on the treadmill. It takes strength, perseverance, and most importantly the grace of God to give up the world so that we will not lose our soul. It is a process that takes time, suffering, and self doubt and abandonment that hopefully leads us to faith. But the rewards are small seeds that are sown for the good of the Kingdom of God. Even though the fruit of these seeds may not be seen in our lifetime, we must sow them for the good of others and for our eternal hope in greater things to come. This is not as pleasurable as chasing after worldly pleasures and comforts, but it is a step that each of us must take if we desire sainthood.
So I do not watch much TV anymore, thus I do not watch many sports anymore. But since it is football season, I inevitably watch more than I do during other seasons of the year. And when I do, I am able to see the extra commercial junk that surrounds the event that I am watching. For years, I did not notice because I was so absorbed in the media (what is a couple more pounds to a fat man?). But now that I have considerably cut back on my sports consumption, I can see the difference between the entertainment of the world and those striving to follow God (just flip between a football game and EWTN on a Sunday afternoon and you will see it too). Yet, when I do watch sports, there is a carnal part of me that wants to jump back in and consume everything I can. But there is also a stronger and more subtle part of me that loves the interior peace I have gained from making some worldly sacrifices. The battle rages on, and some days are not fun. But the hope of something greater than cheering for a first round loss in the playoffs is certainly a more attractive life to live.
